When I first started Tumblr, I never knew I’d last this long as a blogger frankly because 1) I’ve never been one of those ‘cyberspace peeps’ before and 2) I haven’t gotten much time for these kinds of things. Three years ago, I tried out Tumblr for the fun of it. End of story. Not once did I ever think of things like “Oh hey, maybe I can record my life here in the Internet!” or “This is the only place where I can truly express myself… Sobs.” because really, what kind of brain do you think I had when I was 11?
So basically, all I did was reblogged profane images of what I thought was “cool”. I admit: at first it was all about trying to fit in. Frequent changing of tumblr themes and descriptions weren’t really foreign to me, and - God forbid - those autoplay audio. (And to think that I had a colorful, normal childhood)
I’ve only started the ‘real’ kind of blogging (not that there’s a fake kind of blogging, but you know what I mean) about a year ago when Alex introduced me to the wonderful blogs of Krixia and Maedelle, who, if I remember correctly, were still doing tons of typographies when I first followed them. Being the kid who tries to fit in, I started a personal blog myself, later being deleted and reincarnated into the blog I use now.
Since then, I’ve matured (have I?) into a hopefully better person. From the 11 year old kid who desperately tried to fit in, to the awful bandwagon-er, to the creepy wallflower. Dramatic shit right there.
I’ve got tons of people to thank for. Because if it weren’t for them, I wouldn’t be the “writer” that I am now, nor will I be able to express myself freely. It’s a long list, but basically they’re the people I followed who changed me in so many ways and they don’t even know it yet.
One of the blogs (non-Tumblr) I want to share though that made me open my eyes to the metamorphosis that I had gone through is Holly’s. I was going through my bloglovin’ dash and I saw Holly’s blog post about her son, Oscar.
… and his “transition”. (Or “growing up”, whichever fits the best)
I was inspired by how dedicated Oscar’s mom is, with taking care of her child and running the family and a blog. I mean, that’s insane. Even I can’t balance my school life and Internet life. I’d end up merging the both of them in one terrible piece.
Going back to my previous years of blogging, I think it’s safe to say that I’ve made this my passion, my lifestyle. I know this isn’t much to say for a fourteen year old, but I really like writing and documenting my life out here. It’s different knowing that you’ve shared at least a part of you to the world, other than keeping it all locked up in a small diary (although, that works well too). It feels different.
So just now, I realized that I want this blogging lifestyle, wherever this may go, to stay with me not only until I’ve graduated, or gotten into work. I want to document my life in here. And if possible, inherit it to my children, and to their children, and so on and so on. I know, sentimentality rocks.
But before all that… I have got to minimize my cussing in here.